I am a coach! Coaching is my business. I definitely see value in coaching, so I was a little mystified when I realized that I wanted to ghost my own coach. It had nothing to do with him, I enjoy the conversations we have, he is kind and understanding, and above all, I see progress with him. So what gives?

Here are some insights on what might be going on when we have that desire to ghost on a meeting that brings us benefit.

It can be difficult to keep appointments that we don’t want to attend, especially if we are feeling anxious or overwhelmed. However, it is important to remember that appointments are often scheduled for our own benefit, and canceling or rescheduling them can have negative consequences.

If you find that you don’t want to keep an appointment, it can be helpful to try to identify the root cause of your reluctance. Are you feeling anxious or stressed about the appointment itself? Are you feeling overwhelmed with other commitments or responsibilities? Understanding the reason for your reluctance can help you come up with a plan to address the issue.

Here are some things you can try if you don’t want to keep an appointment:

1. Talk to someone you trust: Share your concerns with a friend, family member, or therapist. They may be able to offer perspective and support as you navigate your feelings.
2. Reflect on the potential consequences: Consider the potential consequences of canceling or rescheduling your appointment. Will it cause problems for you or others if you don’t attend? Will it negatively impact your progress or well-being if you don’t follow through with the appointment?
3. Find a way to make the appointment more manageable: If you’re feeling overwhelmed or anxious about the appointment, try to find ways to make it more manageable. Be honest with the person you are meeting with, and share with them your reservations. If they are a true coach or mentor, they are on your side and will meet you where you are at.
4. Seek professional help: If you’re struggling with anxiety or other mental health issues that are making it difficult to keep appointments, consider seeking the help of a mental health professional. A therapist or counselor can help you develop coping strategies and build resilience to manage your feelings and better navigate difficult situations.

Ultimately, the decision to keep or reschedule an appointment is up to you, but it’s important to consider the potential consequences and try to find ways to manage your feelings and follow through with your commitments.

For me, it was that I realized I hadn’t done as much of the work as I had agreed to in our last session. I was afraid to admit that, or try to fake my way through it and own up to the fact I was feeling overwhelmed.
In the end, I kept it and as a result, I am sharing this with you and feeling much better about the strategy my coach and I created together to accomplish the work that I want to.